updated information

Had to go in Monday for my glucose testing. Mmmm yummy..that drink that make you drink is so good..haha Went to the OB yesturday. She said I passed my glucose test which I was relieved of because it seems as though I constantly crave sweet things so it had me a little worried. All looks well with the baby. I am starting my 26th week now and the doc. said the baby is measuring approx. a week and a half further along than I actually am. She measured the abdomen like 3times and was like wow this baby is measuring chubby. Then she measured the femur and said this baby is most likely going to be tall. So this could be one of two things, could mean nothing that its just going to be a big baby..(lucky me) or I am going to have the baby sooner than the intended due date. I hope it is option two:) I gained another 3lbs. Yay..NOT!!
The IP emailed me one day last week and said she had made all her hotel and flight arrangements and said she would be staying for approx. two wks. after the baby is born and flying in two days before the due date. Then she asks me "Do you think you could have the baby before the due date?" I thought wow she is new at this..lmao So I sent her an email back stating that there is always the possability of delivering before the due date, that it doesn't depend on me it depends on when her daughter decides she is ready to come into the world. I explained to her that I delivered both of my children 2wks. before the due date so knowing that information I would expect that there is a high possability that I will go into labor earlier than the due date.
So then yesturday after the appt. I email her with this information and she still had her flight information the same..and she's like if you think you're going to go early I need to change my flight plans..uuhh didn't I just explain the wk. before this doesn't depend on me? hmmm.. I told her I would come at least a wk. before the due date to be safe and if anything happens before that she better be ready to hop on a plane at any moment! Uhh..I would hate to miss the birth of my child that I had so longed for right?
Anyways, that is all thats new with me for now. I have to say with the exception of the unfortunate way the beginning of this journey was that the rest of it has been great. Very stress free and easy flowing. I definatly have a few things that I wish I could change but lessons learned and I honestly think I would do this again because it is just such a great experience:)

Hello Everyone,

Sorry I haven't updated in awhile. I have had alot going on personally with my family and have been trying to deal with that. I have had a few Doc. appts. since my last post. Everything has gone well. The OB says I am gaining the correct amount of weight for how far along I am. Everything with the baby is good..growing perfectly:) I go back in about 3wks for the diabetes testing..oh that should be fun. I can't remember how the stuff tastes but I hear its pretty bad!! The baby moves all the time..kicking up a storm:) The belly is definatly growing now too. Woke up one day and realized I was pregnant..lol Thought I was bloated from eating a bowl of ice cream the night before but it hasn't gone away yet..hmmm?? I have about 2pair of pants left that fit me still and then I'm gonna have to go do some shopping for new clothes..yay...NOT!! At least now they have cute stuff..when I had my kids maternity clothing wasn't all that hott..lol

Anyways, thats all that I have to report..I will post a few pics. from my last appt:) They aren't very good..the baby was being stubborn that day. Kept putting her hand in front of her face and had her face smashed up against the placenta. There is one pic of partial face, nose, open mouth and belly... one of the bottom of the feet..and last face,nose mouth and belly:)

Went to the paranatologist on Tuesday. They took alot of pics of the baby. It's still a girl..lol Here are a few of the photos she gave me:)

I went and had blood work at the lab last week. I guess at this point in pregnancy it is standard procedure. I haven't been pregnant in so long I forgot how this all works:) I Went to the OB on Thursday and all my labwork came back fine. She did an ultrasound and I was so amazed at how much the baby had changed/grown since my appointment 2wks. ago. I found out that the baby is a girl. The IP's were very exited to find out the sex of there baby. The OB wants to see me every two wks. for awhile to be safe due to the reduction. I have been feeling great and have a little belly now. I would say another 4wks and I may need to bare down and get maternity clothes. I am at the point now where I don't quite look pregnant just fat..lol I am almost looking forward to looking pregnant so people will not look at me and just think I'm a fat ass...lol :) I have a surrogate support group mtg. tomorrow in Irvine and then an appointment with a paranatologist to do an extensive ultrasound on Tuesday. The OB told me this is a standard procedure as well. I don't remember them ever doing that with my children but technology is so much more advanced now than it was then... its amazing!!

I will try to update whenever there are changes but at this point its all going well. Glad things are on a more posative path now and I'm happy to be feeling better and focusing on what I set out to do.

Thanks again to everyone who is following/reading my blog:)

Doc appt.

Went to the OB for the first time today. I don't think that this OB has ever worked with a surrogate before..I felt a little like an outcast at first..it was a little awkward. They asked alot of questions and just seemed uneasy at first, I hope that is not a sign of how the rest of our visits are going to be:( I don't think it will though..I'm sure she was just trying to get a feel for everything:)Maybe I'm just not used to working with a female doctor. I've always had male OB's which I kinda prefer but I thought what the heck I will try a female this time and see how it goes. Anyways the appt. went well. She did an ultrasound and the baby is doing well. She said its an active little baby:) I have to go back in two weeks for a checkup, due to the reduction she wants to keep a close eye on things.
I have gained weight and am at the point now where I don't quite look pregnant but chubby..I forgot how horrable that makes you feel. When you go places and you just feel like the chubby girl. At least when you're further along people can say "Oh she's pregnant" ... but no not quite there yet..just look like a chub..lol This is the part of pregnancy I don't enjoy..weight gain..blah blah blah..yuck!! Being over 30 and starting heavier than I would like..I see a big difference:( I will suck it up and know that its all for a good cause right:P ?

Just wanted to give you all a brief update on how I am doing since the procedure. Surprisingly I am doing quite well. I think the anticipation and anxiety leading up to the procedure really was the most difficult. Knowing what I had to do and the sadness I felt for the baby that was going to be taken. I was filled with shame and guilt and couldn't grasp how someone who longed for a child could do such a thing. I don't know if I will ever fully understand the IP's decision but the fact of the matter is its done and I have moved on. I have prayed for forgiveness and I fully believe in my heart that God has granted me that forgiveness. God knows the person that I am and only he truly knows my soul and I know that he forgives me!! I am not going to dwell on the past and continue to allow this to affect my life and this process. I have moved on and I am exited each and every day for the gift that I am going to be giving to this couple. I have my first appt. with an OB next week so I will let you all know how it goes and post pictures if they give me any:)

Thanks again for those of you who have followed my blog and have given me words of encouragement and kindness.

What's done is done

Well yesturday was the day. Monday was an extremely difficult day for me as I knew what Tuesday had to bring for me. I gave one last attempt with the IP on Monday evening to try and deter her from going through with this, but my attempt failed. She explained to me that she wanted the doctor to only transfer one egg because she didn't want this to happen. She is older and explained to the doctor from the beginning that she felt she was physically only capable of caring for one child and he explained to her that the chances of the transfer were greater if transfering two eggs. It is just amazing that both eggs took which brings us to this unfortunate event.
I went to the doctor Tuesday and she was extremely nice and very in depth about all that I needed to know. Dangers/risks to myself and the babies..carrying multiples etc. At first she just kept going on and on and I thought just shut up and get it over with. I was just so overwhelmed I just wanted to be done with it! Once it was all said and done I was glad that she talked and talked because she made me feel alot more at ease and comfortable. I was in a situation that I wasn't happy to be in and she could sense that and I told her that. She tried to make me feel as comfortable as possable. The procedure is done! I feel better than I thought I would. I feel horrible obviously but at this point what's done is done and I need to move forward. It is time for me now to move on and focus on the posative aspect of this whole journey that I set out on. In the end of this all I will still be blessing a family with a beautiful beautiful gift!!
I appreciate all your guys' thoughts and prayers throughout the difficult times of this, it truly has helped me and moved me with all of your caring words.

Went to the doctor today. He said the babies are really growing. He says to me, "Wow these babies are getting big." lol He only gave me the picture of one since he knew I was undergoing a reduction. I told him that she still wanted to persue it so he felt that giving me a picture of only one was fair. I go in next Tuesday for the reduction. Please pray for the best. I have been praying for a miricle in that she will change her mind but I have a feeling it's not going to work. Either way next week is going to be a difficult week for me and I am going to have to get over the hurdle and move forward. I appreciate everyones prayers and thoughts:)

So I recieved an email the other day from my case worker. She informed me that the IP had spoken with the Doctor that will be performing the procedure. After speaking to the Doctor she still wants to move forward with the procedure. I am quite surprised because after hearing about it I was discusted and if it were my child I would be even more discusted. On that note I realize that nothing is going to change and it is what it is and there's nothing more that I can do at this point. I will go ahead with the procedure when the time comes and I will move forward from there..knowing that at the end of all of this I am still going to be doing something completly amazing for someone. I am not going to allow this to ruin that!! Although it sucks and I obviously feel horrable that they are making this decision I am going to stay strong and focused on what I set out to do.